Past, Present, Future
I just watched Hitch …
again…
I had already seen it. Enjoyed it the first time, loved it the second.
It is funny how I find myself feeling so similar to how I felt a few good years back.
There was a part of me, before I learnt to love, that genuinely believed that for some reason, my life was going to be different, that I was going to for some reason, pursue different things, achieve and fight for different goals.
This believe never changed but was altered. A guy; A simple guy, a friend, a truly amazing friend before anything else. I found myself falling. I even imagined something I sward to my friends I would never desire. Ideas of a future, not at all forgetting achievements or goals, but, a future with someone by my side.
Unfortunately I hit the ground.
A few good years after and my belief was forced to alter.
Watching Hitch and I say in my head, oh my god I wish I could feel like that. Be wanted like that. Be loved like that.
For the probably, last 3 years my feelings haven’t even been corresponded; At least not strongly or as truthfully as I could wish.
Maybe a few good years ago I knew better, maybe then I really knew what is best for me, what will be coming my way.
again…
I had already seen it. Enjoyed it the first time, loved it the second.
It is funny how I find myself feeling so similar to how I felt a few good years back.
There was a part of me, before I learnt to love, that genuinely believed that for some reason, my life was going to be different, that I was going to for some reason, pursue different things, achieve and fight for different goals.
This believe never changed but was altered. A guy; A simple guy, a friend, a truly amazing friend before anything else. I found myself falling. I even imagined something I sward to my friends I would never desire. Ideas of a future, not at all forgetting achievements or goals, but, a future with someone by my side.
Unfortunately I hit the ground.
A few good years after and my belief was forced to alter.
Watching Hitch and I say in my head, oh my god I wish I could feel like that. Be wanted like that. Be loved like that.
For the probably, last 3 years my feelings haven’t even been corresponded; At least not strongly or as truthfully as I could wish.
Maybe a few good years ago I knew better, maybe then I really knew what is best for me, what will be coming my way.
I feel love died, for me.
I guess I lost faith.
I guess I lost faith.
posted by Leila at 1:47 PM
1 Comments:
Hitch is such a fun and nice film :) Love it.
We all have these ideas for our own life, for what we want to do and be when we get older. Somewhere along the way, some dreams are lost, others are forgotten or even messed up. And your life may be always lived in a present tense but i think it's only after, when the future becomes present that you can understand where you were back then and if the road you're in seems right or wrong. or not. Some people have no clue whatsoever.
I hope you can find your faith in the future. Whenever that may be, as long as it happens. :)
Big Kiss *
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