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Well, Aren't we just a ray of fucking sunshine.

Not the brightest crayon in the box now are we?

If only men were as satisfying as chocolate.

Whoop-dee fucking-do!

For a Good Time, Call Someone Else.

I'm sorry. My fault. I forgot you were an idiot.

I do whatever the little voices tell me to do.

A few clowns short of a circus aren't we?

A clean house is a sign of a wasted life.

Please take a number and stick it up your ass.

Damn right I'm good in bed, I can sleep for days.

I'm still hot, it just comes in flashes now.

A hard-on doesn't count as personal growth!

Ask me about my ability to annoy complete strangers.

Behind every great woman is a whiny bastard.

Please feel free to shut the fuck up!

Amazingly enough I don't give a shit!

I want it all and I want it delivered by cute, naked men.

Even my shrink says it's all your fucking fault.

Admitting you're an asshole is the first step.

And your bullshit opinion would be?

I'm smiling, that alone should scare you.

You say i'm a bitch like it's a bad thing!

Alcohol was invented so ugly people could get laid too.

Do I look like a fucking people person!?