[Heartless] ... Long story, made shorter:

Boy and Girl meet.
Girl young and silly. Boy sweet, funny, aggressive in that hot naughty dangerous way.
Girl and Boy get along, Girl likes Boy but doesn’t understand that feeling, Boy falls in love with Girl, Boy and Girl start something, Girl doesn’t make it easier, Boy fights for them.

Beautiful right?

Girl learns about love the hard and stupid way, mistake made, big mistake made. Girl really hurts Boy. Girl can’t cope with pain. Girl cheated on Boy as in: she got kissed by another friend on a drunken evening and then worse doesn’t tell him. Live and learn - lesson: Tell the truth no matter what? Boy hurt, can’t cope with pain.

Boy meets another girl. Girl doesn’t back down, doesn’t give him space. Boy confused. Boy gets physically involved again with Girl. Boy then cuts everything again with Girl and carries on whatever the fuck he had with the fucking other previous girl.

Wait, it gets better!

Boy cheats on girl with Girl. Funny? Not really, pathetic of Girl really.

Mess.

Boy doesn’t love Girl. Girl can’t cope. Girl takes the opportunity as it arises and runs away. Far away.

Girl visits country on holidays. Every time round Boy and Girl get physically involved. Two years go by of this? Still Boy doesn’t love Girl. No. His words among other: Not in love with you.

Girl pushed constantly away. Fuckingly stupidly Girl never cuts the “relationship”. Girl torn between trying to move on and not understanding how his words can be different to his actions.

Boy has a fight on the internet with Girl. Girl sad. TWO WEEKS later Boy emails Girl. Boy with another girL. Girl is so fucking hurt. Girl is crushed. Girl can’t cope.
Girl gets sick when thinking about Boy with someone else.

Holiday time, Girl prays not to deal with Boy with girL. Stupidly Boy and Girl still meet. Boy and Girl friends? Boy cheats on girL.

Funny? Again? For fuck sake while I write this I see how pathetic Girl is.

Boy though, still doesn’t want or love Girl. Of course not.


Later Girl meets boY. boY is amazing. boY gives Girl hope. Girl so desperately wants to believe she can be special to someone. Girl isn’t as young anymore but still fucking stupid. boY likes Girl. boY and Girl begin a far away / holiday times special friendship. Girl doesn’t think how she might hurt boY.

Girl tells Boy she learning she likes boY. Boy says things like: you accuse me of moving on and now who is moving on? Added: Have a great life (ironic tone, of course). Followed by: apology for such an intense and horrible email… Girl fucking stupidly carries on attempting to bond with Boy. Maybe it is actually possible for Girl and Boy to be friends. Girl is not really letting go, is she?

People laugh… Girl seriously, after close to three years you still not letting go of someone that keeps telling you they not in love with you, that they don’t love you anymore? How many times must we tell you? Move on, people say.

Girl not on holiday, so far away. Boy one day decides he is not happy. Boy and Girl argue over internet. Boy says he wants to “close the door”. Girl is confused… was the friendship as it was at the time not working? Girl is so fucking stupid, gets upset, gets scared, doesn’t want to move on. Boy apologises for all the hurt. Girl cries, Girl actually believes Boy’s words. Girl believes his words to be real, true, genuine. Boy later on, in summary speaks: about strong feelings, wanting a second chance. Girl is so fucked up inside.

BUT hold on,

Wanting a chance when Girl gets back in the country of course!

Girl hurts boY. Girl holidays shortly. Girl tries to be as honest as she can with boY, boY such a good friend. Hurts Girl to hurt boY.
Girl meets up with Boy. Something still there? Girl believes things Boy says like: I want you in my life, You make me happy… Girl so fucking stupid. Girl believes maybe there is the possibility. Girl doesn’t want to jump into anything. Girl still acts with caution. Girl actually believes Boy. Boy speaks of always having had these feelings and never been able to deal with them not knowing how but wanting Girl. Girl leaves fucked up. Girl thinking… maybe when course is finished and Girl returns, Girl will be able to deal with all these things, feelings, broken wishes and hope for possible new beginnings.

Can this get any better? TWO MONTHS LATER:

Boy emails girl: “should have sent this email a few time ago, been thinking about us, we will always have a connection, HOWEVER, decision is made, I will let you go as I should had done it a long time ago. I think for the first time I realize that you or me won’t move on until we put a true ending to our relationship. I’m sorry for all the hardship that I made go through and the pain I caused. I only can hope that we can still be friends.”

Funny? Anyone feel sorry for Boy? Easy to fucking always apologise.

Girl hurt, Girl fucking upset. Girl so fucking angry for allowing herself to have felt again for Boy, for have thought about them again, for wondering if maybe there was a real honest chance of it working out between them in the near future. Girl replied to Boy with things like: “So I have not even returned yet and you telling me "let’s break" up? Man if there is another fucking girl just tell it to me straight ok. For a month or more you could have sent me an email asking how I am talking anything... being a friend. But did you? NO. Now to tell me that well actually, you know what, I have thought better and really my feelings are not that strong, that you can do. Right. To things like: Fine. I wish you were just fucking honest with me from the start instead of always playing with my feelings.”

So does everyone want to see Boy’s reply?

Boy replies a week later of course, because he is probably now busy fucking the new girL: “Yes I was stupid I made my decision some time ago, and yes I'm with somebody else. I should have told you on the first email. But no I didn't want to play with your feelings, it wasn't my intention. I'm sorry once again for messing up with u. Once again It wasn't my intention.”

Girl doesn’t know how to feel as inevitable girL can only be better than her. Girl has no one else to blame but herself because told you, over and over gain, Boy was only screwing her mind. Boy had only thought he wanted Girl when Girl found boY. Girl defended Boy over and over, Girl said no, Boy isn’t like that.

Boy understood in two months that Girl isn’t what he wants. Boy found another girL after telling Girl when and if she came back he wanted to see what they could have together. How could Girl have fucking believed Boy’s feelings were real? Or… then again, doesn’t Girl understand all the hurt Boy caused Girl can only be Girl’s fault?

How could Girl love Boy so much? Still, after so many years of pain, How? Why did Boy hurt Girl again, so fucking intensively?
It can’t be Boy’s fault he meet girL and fell in love… so it can only be stupid of Girl to be so angry, upset and hurt inside. Boy never promised Girl nothing. Girl has no right to be angry or sad.

-> It was never Boys intention.

Girl is fucked up inside. Girl thinks Boy was a fucking heartless bastard. Girl can’t feel anything but hate towards Boy. Girl can’t breath. Girl doesn’t respect herself. Girl is so fucking stupid, it hurts her inside.

-> Now, Girl is Heartless.