My Diary

I had more than one blog and decided one day to erase them. Was not long ago and I still feel the pain I felt last friday inside me. This will be my place, and this time I won't give this blog out, just my place to wirte all the shit i feel. Complain about the shit I feel I am and not feel bad that all I do is "cry". It is true I know it but still they are my feelings and although I am trying so damn hard to smile inside there is a lot and the ergue to cry gets larger and larger.
I know this is going to be a place I'm probably like on the other blog write about him, n, but at least now i assume yes it is my point of view, the way i see things and i really don't understand why you told me that about the other blog. I don't read your mind so of course I don't know how you see or feel anything.
Anyway. My place to fucking let out all the shit inside of me.

Already today I had to deal with you. You walk closer to me and I start to tremble. Hate the impact. Hate the way you now make me feel so stupid, small and pathetic when you around me.
I guess friday made me really feel like a silly child. That girl standing waiting for you, older, smarter is the only thing in my mind. makes me sad. today i turned my face and you didn't give me the usual kiss on my forhead. i know maybe i should not have done that, but it ain't special no more. before it was. now i don't feel like i'm anything to you so i don't deserve that kiss. Was important to me and now I'm feeling really sad but i really got to face things the way they are. You want to carry on with your life and i'm going to have to leave you alone.

just been told you were smoking. hate this. hate this so damn much.

tomorrow going to get back the test. horrible day i know it is going to be a horrible day.

ok, enough of this today.